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Searched Htb for m:mxkøeasym, found 1,
mxkøeasym [wt] [HTB] [wiki] [[...]] 
cannot bear the thought of it (e.g.; of leaving one's family to go abroad); feel very much grieved and dissatisfied with one's self for what one has done (e.g. for injuring one's own child)
過意不去; 不放心

Maryknoll
m-køeasym/mxkøeasym [wt] [HTB] [wiki] u: m'koex'sym; m-køex'sym [[...]][i#] [p.]
cannot bear the thought of it (e.g., of leaving one's family to go abroad), feel very much grieved and dissatisfied with one's self for what one has done (e.g. for injuring one's own child)
過意不去,不放心